People often use ‘being honest’, as an excuse for insult without repercussions.
I wonder, just how many times have we taken this new liberation, new guise, to say what we know will hurt. People have taken ‘truth telling’ to a whole new level.
” Oh you’re a bit chubby aren’t you? and have a large nose…” or “Hi… you have an overbearing personality…”
“Don’t be insulted, I was just telling the truth…” says the honest one.
Well, the honest truth is, there are a billion and one ‘truths’ in the world. The sky is blue = truth. The grass is green= truth. It doesn’t mean we go out spewing ‘GRASS IS GREEN!” or “SKY IS BLUE!” at every random turn. It doesn’t mean we go out and keep on saying ‘Hey you are quite fat hor?” at every turn either.
I am all for truth, for honesty, but who are we to be the self-proclaimed liberators of people living lies?
Most of the time, people are aware of their physical properties, they are aware of their flaws. We are our own worst critics after all. So do we really help them further by pointing it out? If anything, we increase their insecurities.
IF the argument is that truth telling leads to ‘helping’ others realize their mistakes or negatives, no one is really that ‘nice’ and ‘helpful’. People make claims to their good intent, but the question here IS this said intent. Is your ‘truth’ coming from a place of love, or from nothing more than nasty criticism? And its almost impossible to prove ‘intent’, other than our own gut feelings.
There needs to be a very wise, very discerning practice on helping others by pointing out truths. There is a very fine line, and what separates the line remains still, blurred.
We cannot begin to exercise our judgement on other people’s lives, it is just not our place.
p.s./ This is a reminder to myself, as much as it is a post for the world.