If Linny, Jowee and Ea formed a band: A list of band names & Re-living the past

In 2009, Zaleha, Linny and I formed a band and entered a talent competition. We came in second place. At the time we called ourselves ” Something for Now” because we needed a band name, just something for the moment … and that is why we have the totally appropriate and totally lame-sounding, ” Something For Now”.

Now a few years later, and older and wiser, together with our newly acquired “band manager”, we managed to come up with a list of 40 awesome names to choose from and their accompanying genres. Viva La Band!

  1. Lola – Pop Rock
  2. Unjustified Notes – Singer- songwriter
  3. Rebel Causes – HXC
  4. Mrs. Big – Malay
  5. El Totoro – HXC, Pop- Rock
  6. Influx- HXC
  7. Autumn Rangers- Dream pop
  8. The Hairsprays – 60s
  9. Canning Park – Malay
  10. The TZL Experiment – Jazz
  11. Red Buttons – Brit Pop
  12. Zaleha Learns to Rock  – * (Like Michael) pop-rock
  13. Ea Learns to Rock – * ( In case Zaleha is too long, we’ll have it shortened) pop Rock
  14. Gold & Wine – Folk
  15. Tukar Kaki – * ( Like Switchfoot) Christian Rock
  16. Wink 182 – Punk
  17. AC/ Tee Jowee
  18. Time Stood Still Before Me & I’m Not Afraid To Die – HXC
  19. Lipstick
  20. ya ya yas!
  21. KL Police Club
  22. RTM BAND: Keroncong Malaysia
  23. Cheras Bicycle Club
  24. Tame Tapir
  25. My Boyfriend is Stupid – Punk
  26. Fingertips – Punk
  27. Slow Hands – Contemporary/ Indie Alternative
  28. Sediments – Some form of rock
  29. Experiments
  30. Righteous – Old School Rock
  31. Ahelaz * ( Is Zaleha spelt backwards)
  32. Her & Her
  33. She & Her
  34. Tiga Kolar T – Shirt
  35. Flying Pebbles
  36. Humming
  37. The Truth Seekers
  38. The OK-Las
  39. The boleh Jugak
  40. Rage Against the Tapirs



New Year’s Resolutions : 2014


Good morning world,

It’s the first day of 2014. I have always loved new beginnings, wiping the slate clean, and having a fresh start to everything. So, it’s the perfect time to start making plans!

SO, here is my ” How to be a better person” battle plan. The projected timeline, as always, is towards the end of 2014. So by December 2014, if I am not a “successful” 24 year old then I would have been at least better off than if I had not made a plan. You know, it’s the whole “shoot-for- the- moon- land- on- the- stars” idea?

Career Goals:

  • Tutor in University. Consequently, be the best tutor ever; having an excellent in-depth knowledge of the material, on the ball, professional with excellent delivery.
  • Engage in RA work
  • Write at night (Consequently, to stop taking blogging as “writing”. It is not the same type of writing.)
  • Get over fear of publishing
  • Start earning money through my writing
  • Pursue PHD ( have ideas and paperwork underway)
  • Save RM 10,800 by the end of 2013

Health Goals:

  • Flat, lean, trim perut (Go for Core Ex classes at the gym!)
  • Go to the gym at least two times a week. This is more financial than health actually. The way I figure, if I go for their classes at least twice I would have spent my money’s worth. Classes for consideration: Yoga, Core Exercises, Cardio.
  • Be a full-on Pescetarian (fish and eggs acceptable). It’s my stepping stone towards a full-on vegan diet.
  • Futsal Team every Thursday (oh yeah!). Also: improve my Futsal skills. Be a midfield magician (heh heh).

Family Goals:

  • Earn enough to give family RMXXX a month
  • Help mother in ways I can (like groceries)
  • Help sister with ways I can (like baby keith)
  • always ask if they need help ( like tapau food)

Relationship Goals: 

  • Make 10 new friends, good friends.
  • Text all existing friends at least once a week (busy can not be an excuse, ever)

Self-improvement goals:

  • Always drive under or at the speed limit ( No more driving like an inconsiderate Malaysian)
  • no more cursing
  • no more drinking (It is really not good for your health, I’m starting to feel it)
  • pick up the bass
  • write music
  • make art
  • attend a show (music) I really want to, alone.
  • Attend good shows (music) around the region
  • figure out where my musical tastes truly lie
  • Reply all texts and e-mails within the day  ( Being responsible and responsive and professional)
  • Further enhance with reading many types of texts and material, news and current affairs, novels etc.
  • Finish my duo lingo French course online
  • Finish my Coursera courses
  • Finish reading all my books from Big Bad Wolf
  • Stop complaining about what I do
  • Execute dumb ideas beautifully

Personal projects:

  • Release at least 12 episodes of the Daryl and Jowee Music show. This will be a monthly podcast of sorts. The purpose and aims of this show is: 1) To be a representation of my gender in the media environment. 2) To enhance my music knowledge. 3) To create and enhance my editing skills. 4) To engage in a positive hobby with my Daryl.
  • Release at least 12 episodes of the Jowee and Zaleha Variety show. As above 1) To be a representation of my gender in the media space, to make our voice louder. 2) To enhance my video editing skills 3) To create 4) To laugh
  • 50’s fashion (or rock). Time to shop vintage. Dark red lips, curls, eyelashes. The aims for this is to just have fun, it is an interest. It keeps me thinking, inspired and creative. Also, it’s just a chance at self-expression. 
  • Social Media project  This is slightly related to #3 above. This is just taking a stab at enhancing my social media self -representation, for sustaining said inspiration.

By the way guys, it’s the year of the horse this year. My year. It’s quite significant to experience the second cycle. I have a feeling things are going to be good. OPTIMISM! #cautiousOPTIMISM!

Being Grateful for 2013: A List

Here are some of the things I want to remember about 2013:

1. Got a full scholarship for my Honour’s year.

Consequently met some of the best people ever, cohorts, supervisors, academic staff and all.

2. Wrote a Thesis and completed my Honour’s year  

I can never thank my supervisor, family and friends enough for this one. Their support was immeasurable.

3. Fractured my finger playing Futsal

How have I lived 23 years without a sport-related injury? Well, try never playing a sport ever. Which leads to…

4. Played Futsal

Now, I have a “team”- loosely formed.

I wanted to try something new. I wanted to do the kind of thing that I wasn’t necessarily good at, but was passionate about. Because how often are we only passionate about the things we’re good at? and afraid to do things because we’re bad at it?

Oh trust me, I’m bad at this.

5. Found 5 puppies thrown away at the side of the road

This was significant because I fulfilled a childhood dream of mine- Save animals. I had always wanted to pick up strays as a child, but no one would let me of course. It wasn’t pretty, nothing about the entire process was. But found them all homes in 2 days, and realized that there are such good people around.

6. Made 8 new, good friends (and all my old friends still love me) 

I love these people.

7. Lost a friend 

Prior to this, I had never broken up with any “friend” before. Sure people fall in and out of touch in our lives, but we’re still “friends”. This is the first time I ever forthrightly told someone I did not want to be their friend.

You see, friendship is one of the most important “ships” in my life, and almost everything  can be solvable and salvageable to me. BUT, this year I learned what was not okay and I am a better, wiser person for it.

8. My baby nephew was born 

I am lost for words at the miracle of life.

9. Went to Singapore for Two Door Cinema Club, Bloc Party, Urbanscapes with Tegan and Sara, Franz Ferdinand, Mew and Explosions in the Sky, 65 Days of Static… 

I am very happy with where the music industry is going. The local scene is booming, and many old/new bands are coming in. I am a very happy music-lover.

10. Had the opportunity of being part of roughly 200 young lives 

It was a privilege I will not take lightly. This was where I learned your heart can open to be X200 times larger than what it is.

11. Had the opportunity to teach 14 teenagers a little something

I had always been afraid of teenagers. This experience opened my eyes. I love these kids.

12. Had a post go viral

I had always been wrought with self-doubt about my chosen field- writing, and I had always wanted a larger audience. So first, this experience gave me some form of confirmation that what I am doing can be called “good”, and secondly I no longer desire “fame”. To have a lack of control was NOT fun.

13. Voted for the first time 

Consequently, it was also one of the more significant elections of our time.

14. Changed my relationship with food

Decided to become a vegetarian for various, and perhaps “all” reasons- health, environmental, ethics- everything. I am not a vegetarian yet, I still succumb to meat some days. It is more accurate to say I am a pescetarian. But more importantly, I eat because I am hungry and have to eat, not because I am bored, or greedy, or just because I want to eat. I am a lot more careful and make more conscious choices and efforts to think about what I am putting in my body, and the kind of effects it would have on the world/earth. Even more significant is how much better my relationship with food is now compared to when I was a teenager. Did you know I used to be afraid to eat? This is a victory if I ever saw one.

In the following days, and the next post I am going to write about my New Year’s resolutions. It is a long, extensive list I have not gotten around to writing yet. But I need to write it down, I need an audience to help me be accountable.

Anyway, I am signing off now. Until next time…

Five things I learnt this year



1. Quality time is a privilege 

I had mentioned that this year was a “bad” year for me. It was one marked by stress and a full timetable of running from school to school, from doing my research, to teaching in two schools that I hardly had time for anything else. I missed the privilege of quality time with my friends and family and the people that make “life”. I didn’t have time for any of my interests and hobbies or myself anymore, and I was so drained each day.

2. I am bad at many things 

Things that used to come so naturally to me, or things I used to think I was good at seemed to be overturned by all these people who were so much better, or all these situations where I failed, and failed to produce good work. I was made aware of all my weaknesses and areas where I fell short. However, I take some sort of comfort in knowing that having to struggle and fail is an essential part of knowing that we are growing. This was a profound experience for me.

3. I am good at many things ( I didn’t know I was good at)

Life is also a paradox, because while it felt like I was losing certain things, like “quality time” and the things I “used to be” good at, I was also beginning to gain and fall in love with many things, like education; like the idea that life isn’t about me; like the idea of offering a contribution to the world, not as if I could “save the world” as I once naively thought I could, but just in doing what I can to try. This is by far one of the more freeing ideas of life.

4. It is okay to not be okay 

More importantly, I learned in numerous times and numerous occassions that it is okay to not be okay, and that it is okay to feel completely alone. There is a lot of comfort in knowing you are not the only one, and everyone is almost, just like that. I also learned,  you don’t have to “feel inspired” to work. Heck you don’t have to feel at all sometimes. To be inspired is a privilege. To learn is a privilege not afforded to many. To live is a privilege not afforded to many.

5. Finally being able to be grateful 

It was only during this last month where I finally stopped complaining and griping (goodness it took me twelve months to be grateful), which made me all the more aware that I need to enjoy each and every moment, stop and just breathe. I was finally able to appreciate my year for what it was- colorful,  filled with all the experiences of growing up, and the kind of learning that would not have happened if I had not truly been living. I think sometimes we expect life to bring us greatness, with all the great expectations that comes with hope, that we often bypass all the little, quiet, unremembered days that makes life all the more significant.

Maybe more importantly I learned how I am going to be better next year. I’m so excited! Are you?


p.s.// I also discovered I have something called a Mild Thoracic Scoliosis. I had never known it was there for 23 years of my life. This was definitely something.

TOP TEN: List of Dominant Thoughts in life Thus far


image via pinterest

1. I hate writing online. Writing online has killed nearly everything good about writing. All these competing ideas, and articles to get more likes and clicks, tends to move what’s really good about words and thoughts away from popular culture. Write for clarity, they say, don’t write things that are too long, don’t introduce new characters without some sort of explanation, make things easier for the reader, you’re competing for attention remember?! Put in lists! top tens! write about relationships! people love relationships. Write with humor and expletives, people love that!  I say, if J.R.R. Tolkien ever applied any of these “rules” Lord of the Rings would never exist.

2. Doing life has been tough so far. Maybe it’s because people like me are just entering the cusp of life, filled with endless self-doubt. ” Am I in the right job?” ” Is this what I’m supposed to be doing?” ” This job’s okay… but…” There’s always this “but”, this big question mark at the back of our minds that unsettles you every time you think “I’m good.” ” I’m happy” or ” I’m okay”. You graduated with a good degree, good education, and you think you’re ready for work but when you enter the workforce, what you’re doing has nothing to do with the skills you learned in your study. There are people that say ” Oh you’re just a baby!” nearly, and you are. Nothing seems to really fit, being educated in a largely Western tradition, prepares you for nearly nothing about being part of a Malaysian workforce.

3. The Generation Y syndrome? There’s been so much talk about it these days, and the funny thing is these articles about GEN Y are being circulated by GEN-Y-ers themselves. Is it in agreement to many of these claims? That we are coddled and self-absorbed? I agree. But there are some things that GEN Y’s in Malaysia can’t really help. The part where parents pay for their education and rent. It’s more of economics and how far the ringgit goes, if young Malaysians are able to afford paying for their own education, and paying for their houses and cars, they would. I’ve tried suggesting that I wanted to live on my own, and I nearly got disowned. Which might have been nice.

My point is, if the point of these articles are to highlight the problems, then they did a good job. But so far, no one has been able to highlight a good solution, and that’s whats missing. Want an easy solution? Get Generation Y to do things to help other people. The fastest way to step out of their self-absorption and actually look outwardly.

4. Looking back when I was ten, I’m not the person I hoped I would be when I turn twenty. I thought I’d have it together by now. I was greater at being 16 than I am at being 23. I might have been a great 16 year old, I had way more successes and adventures in my years. I had a reach-for-the-stars attitude in life. Now, I find myself constantly “settling” and just really tired all the time.

5. I wanted to be a writer, but you can only really call yourself a writer when you actually, write something, and I’m at the point in my life where I don’t think “blogging” counts as “writing”. What have I written so far? Some commentary pieces, some online pieces for some magazines people don’t read, and some pieces for a magazine I’m not working at anymore.

6. In many ways thirties are the new twenties, and forties are the new thirties and so on. I’m at the age where I don’t really care about my age, so I’m just going to make a blanket statement- I can’t wait till I’m thirty or forty. One, it’s a universal truth that men in their thirties are far better than men in their twenties, and two, I’m waiting for the point in my life where I just don’t care what people think. So people thirty and over, please tell me that my assumptions about being older are true, mostly that you stop caring about what people think, and that men get better than what’s currently happening.

ALSO THIRD, I am poor, I don’t spend money on anything I like, unless you count the purchases I made last night, which don’t count because I didn’t buy anything for myself for six months. The only other time was during the Chinese New Year sale, and now it’s the Ramadhan sale. Can’t wait till more experience equates to more money.

7. What do you think about Marriage and Kids? 

I think nothing of it. Except marriage seems like a way out from living with the parents ( an issue of economics), saying this, it seems exhaustive that the only way I can finally live on my own, is if i lived with someone else, bound by law, and that idea seems pretty exhaustive to me. And kids, refer to point 6, I have barely enough money to keep myself alive let alone another human being.

8. You know what’s really annoying about indie/musical people? 

The constant policing of what’s “good” and what’s “not”. What?! I thought you guys “loved” music, I didn’t know you hated so much more than you claimed to “love”.

9. Speaking of music… Parquet Courts

Parquet Courts is the kind of band you warm up to because you imagine, they could very possibly be you. A little unfit, muffin tops, slightly geeky, nerdy, and in clothes that look like they just got out of their houses; and when Austin Brown bends over to the manipulate feedback effects, you catch a glimpse of his butt-crack. Comparing them to other post-punk alternatives, they stand out as being slightly more lyrically-driven. Most music lovers don’t pay much attention to lyrics and words in a song, but this band just happens to make you take notice.

10.  One of the funnier thoughts that came from my friend Nat was when he said, 

” A Bro doesn’t hold another bro’s hand…”,

It was in response to when Daryl and I got together. We were ‘bros’ before this, we were really ‘GOOD FRIENDS’, and  I liked it that way. So I really don’t relate to all this talk in sub-culture about “friendzoning”, because, everyone’s my friend. I like friends, I love friendships, in many ways I treasure friendships much more than any type of ship.  SO being a friend isn’t secondplace to relationships.

My New Year’s Resolutions 2013- Being a Better Jowee


What are my resolutions this year? 

Well I know that it is very well into the year now, and I am late, but I still make these lists year after year without thinking too much about whether or not I accomplish them. It just gives me a direction and an identity that I look forward to at the end of the year. I am going to be a little better, a better me, a new me, a renewed me!

Last year, the only resolutions I managed to “accomplish” was to graduate, which wasn’t even a real resolution since all that’s required of that is I sit through my exams and pass, which was not hard.

But you know the truth is, every year we should love ourselves a little more, and to be a little better, and that’s why I still make these lists, because it gives me goals, and goals make us reach, and reaching is growth and growth is good, and good is good ( see also: stop using “good” and build vocabulary)

1) The first resolution I am making is – to write more.

I know “more” isn’t really specific enough to be efficient, so I will say, I will write in my blog for at least once a week. Never mind if I am uninspired, that should not be the model on which I will work with anymore.

I need to make public declarations like this here because then I can be accountable to an imagined public, and that will keep me on my toes.

This year something tragic happened to me, writing broke up with me, because she cheated on me. I felt lonely and depressed, confused and I wanted her back. It was a long, LONG courting period. This relationship is so up-down and erratic, and really, really dysfunctional, but when the dysfunction is not dysfunction, it is so working, and “functional” and beautiful.

Also, I really, really missed the creative process. To be able to create is one of the greatest gifts in life, it makes me better, and like I said before, better is good.

2) My second resolution is to read so much of everything that my head explodes

People used to say I have a large head, and a large forehead, and I used to tell them it’s because of my amazingly full brain. It’s time for me to put my money where my mouth is.

My theme this year is “BE INTELLIGENT 2013”! Because the theme last year was “BE THIN 2012!”, sounds shallow, I know, but I assure you it has a deeper meaning into it, to be explained further below.

For this goal this year, I will read EVERYTHING I get my hands on. The specifics of this is really down to every last detail so I won’t list it here, you’ll just have to take my word for it.

(Includes: news, arts, sports, fashion, politics, the economy, business, scholarly papers, novels, magazines, cook books and the like. I also have this great list of novels all lined up for me on my shelf that I will dive into, a lot of booker prize winners and literary winners, which would be good brain food.)

My measure of accomplishment for this is to have 5 people I respect tell me verbally in one way or another, that “hey I’m really insightful, or smart, or intelligent”. I know, my measure of my own intelligence is super reliable.

3) Have gratitude

It keeps me content, and content is a step above happiness.

Happiness is a bit shallow.

4) I will sign up for Fantasy Football this season

Because I want to be cool. Includes a leveling up in Footie knowledge.

5) Get lean.

the goal is getting down to 50 kg this year.

Last year’s wish of “BE THIN 2012″ was only fulfilled this year, it was a bit late but still, really happy that it happened. I went from a 62kg person to a 55kg person. Getting busy helped greatly.

The goal, ” Be thin” wasn’t really an anorexic statement, it encompassed the added goal of being really, really pretty, so I got really hardworking in my personal grooming skills. Grew my hair out and made it curly, and decided to smile more, and willfully stretched my eyebrows and eyes so that it looked bigger and brighter.


Me- the one that looks like she’s going “ngaap”

I can’t remember what was the original motivator of this theme. I think it was wanting for at least once in my life to be pretty, cause it’s not often that happens. Your peak only happens for a few years, and then your body and face tends to deteriorate, so I decided that the year 2012 shall be when my physical beauty peaks. But now that that phase is over and done with, I can focus on other things. Like that giant, beautiful brain of mine. (I had promised it wouldn’t be shallow, but now that I read what I had just said, I have no choice but to conclude that it was shallow, NOT complaining, people tend to complain that I get too “deep” and “intense”, how do you like me now?)

5) Be able to do a somersault and a cartwheel.

A lifelong dream.

6) To be involved in something that I’m NOT good at.

Like math.

7) Grow all friendships to “the next level”


Image meant as a representation of all friendships

again the specifics of this are customized to each relationship I have, so it’s a difficult measure. But, the general rule is, to not let “being busy” be an excuse to not meet people.

8) Get published somewhere I’m proud of.

Another -iffy statement. This is still in the works.

9) Get First Class Honours.

Fund my education myself and not get broke.

My 5 year plan is to be a lecturer and get my PHD.

And well, there is no number ten to this list. This is it, very simple, yet very difficult. The overall skill I am gaining this year is to be so organized, and so on top of my “game”, and my time planning.

I do not manage “time”, there will always be 24 hours in a day, 7 days a week, time doesn’t need to be “managed”. I am “time”. I manage myself.

Okay happy weekend everyone. Will be posting more soon.

Being thankful on Thanksgiving


I started the year of 2012 by listing out all the things I wanted to achieve this year. So before starting this post, I went to revisit my past resolutions, just to find out if I have achieved anything, hoping that I would know what to be thankful for? Then I realized, to my horror and amusement, I have achieved NONE of it, except graduating, which wasn’t even a real challenge anyway, since all you have to do is pass subjects. By the way, people seem to have this impression that I get good grades and that somehow equates to me being smart, but I can assure you that that is NOT the case of my life, and it has NOT been the case of my life, not for a long time. People also seem to think that I’m a good person, but I deny that more than anything. I don’t know why that is the case or what I’m giving off to have people think that. I don’t travel around the world to Cambodia or Africa building dams, houses or wells, the only reason I think I give off that impression is because my opinions run louder than my will to action, which, I am working on, since this is a bad thing. What are the point of having opinions if you do nothing about it?

People also seem to think I’m funny. That one is true.


So I wanted to start this post today by counting my blessings and remembering just how much I am thankful for life, and although I’ve achieved none of my goals set out in my new year’s resolutions, I’m still feeling really grateful, which is in itself something to be thankful for.

I’m thankful for a family, that despite all odds of having a (what I think, quite horrible daughter), still is sticking close together. I’m thankful for friends, for that very special someone in my life I keep on talking about, and for all the people that love me. I’m thankful for losing 7 kilos since coming back from Canada. I’m thankful for being afforded an education, where to others, is a mere luxury. I’m thankful for opportunities, of being able to have worked in a place full of opinion leaders and drivers of an industry, for favor from people I never thought would think of me, for people that have helped along the way, when it comes at no personal gain to them to extend of themselves. I’m thankful for the opportunity to serve a community of people in Jinjang, I’m honored and humbled for their acceptance, and so much more blessed for it.

I’m also really thankful for the change in perspective I’ve had over this year-

The first, is that I don’t know why I had been so sad and depressed about growing up. I realized how miserable and scared I had been when I was a child, then how angry and depressed I was as a teenager, today is the first time in my life that I’m truly happy and satisfied where I’m at and who I am. I’m glad that I’m an adult now, being an adult is fun! It is not sad and depressing like the world keeps on making it out to be. I’m glad I can pay my own bills and that I can take care of myself. I’m glad I can give my parents pocket money, and I’m glad that no one can tell me what I can or can’t eat for breakfast, I can eat cake and chocolates for breakfast if I want to! I am an ADULT! Life is a new adventure. We’re young enough to dream, old enough to live out those dreams.

The second, is that, I thought I had lost my will and determination to succeed in life, then I realized that it was because I no longer cared whether or not I succeeded by the world’s terms of success. I’ve shifted what I cared about, to other things, and that by far was the more freeing thing about my year. But now I think I need to turn a little bit more to caring about what I’m doing, because actions speak louder, and no one would listen if you’re not doing something well, or not doing something of significance.

I’m thankful for having fingers, toes, hands, feet, and that I am not a vegetable. I’m thankful for being able to run, to feel the wind in my ear and sand under my feet.

I’m thankful for Chris Djuma, for Joseph Wong, Kharie, Kimm, Huey Li, Daryl and all you wonderful people that always remind me you are reading what I’m writing, and that my words mean something to you. That is the greatest honor, to be liked and read by people like you. Thank you for encouraging me to go on.

To close this year, I’m not done yet, there’s still a month and a half to go, but be sure that I’m planning more new and more wonderful things for the next year.

Stay tuned!

You know you’re getting older when …

1) Your parents are starting to get really funny

Like the other day when I caught my mother speaking to the laundry, ” Oh you smell so good.” (takes it deep sniffs) ” Oh yes you do… smell so good… ” (sniffs more)

2) The driver around the house is no longer your dad, but you 

3) You start speaking to your parents like they’re the kids now 

” Why you buy that?”

“How much was that?”

” So expensive!”

” But you also have something like that before!”

“What time you coming back?! Don’t come back so late ah!”

– all things we, the kids, have said to them.

4) You find the 13-18 year olds really annoying

Time for you to grow up and stop being so self-centered kids, the world doesn’t revolve around you.

5) You start taking things like safety, security and health really seriously

Gone are the beliefs of invincibility, you’re old enough to know that you can get hurt, and that you can’t take these things for granted.

6) You find yourself having less and less money, despite now, earning your own money

That’s because you start paying for more things

7) You start calling the thirty somethings … forty somethings … fifty somethings …”friends”,  

and it’s slightly weird, but that’s okay.

8) You’ve become really boring, and you’re completely fine with that. 

” What did you do today?”

“Nothing lor, work… come home … eat … sleep, you leh?”

” Same…”

and the most interesting thing that’s happened to you today was, ” You know the squirrel stole our Chiku?”  and you catch yourself saying things like, ” It’s okay lah, they need to eat also.”

Note: I am aware that something like this was posted on Thought Catalogue, and there may be similarities.

New Year’s Resolutions

This New Year, the theme is going to be just one main thing =  BE CONSISTENT.

I take resolutions pretty seriously (like for the first two weeks), because self-improvement is important (until someone pisses you off and you forget to not snip his/her metaphorical brake wires). We need a certain leveling up at each point in life don’t we? So if I took my resolutions last year (link), and added in the extra goal of consistency, I think I’m pretty much set.

Also, I’ve added in a new motto for the year “ BE THIN 2012”. Yeah I know, how different is it from last year right? No, the difference is, its a motto, as in, you can do it Otto!

So my friend Joshua Loo keeps on reminding me about this motto. As we’re climbing up the hill, he whispers, “Be Thin”, as I’m setting down to watch a movie, he mumbles “be thin”. Thanks Loo, thanks. It actually helps. My goal this year is losing 8 kilos. We’ll see how it goes. I set the bar high, so that even if I fail, I’d have gotten somewhere more than if I had set it low. Yeah I’ve wanted to lose weight since I was sixteen, and I must say, losing weight is the only “girl” stereotype I allow myself to have- all others are accidental.

I also mentioned half-jokingly that my resolutions this year was- a boyfriend, Loo said “What?! You can’t make that a goal. If it happens it happens.” Again, Loo has turned into quite the ‘wise one’. Quite honestly, I only mentioned the boyfriend bit this year because I say that every year, its tradition! But this year, I don’t think I want one anymore. Something about wanting the real thing yaddiyaddayadda, and I’m just gonna chill till he comes along or becomes soulmate primero uno. For now, I just want a good snog-fest.

Here’s the list for 2012:

–       Intern. Either at Mindshare, McCain Erickson or Al Jazeera.

–       Graduate. Well that’s a given, if I didn’t that’ll be the saddest.

–       Work. While studying, or whatever I can get (I have not decided on this one, might forego it)

–       Stop being a 78% student. 2 more percents! 2 more percents!

–       Be able to play 20 good songs on the guitar. Full songs, not the half- and- half thing I always do.

–       Be able to play 20 songs on the piano. The impressive, party trick songs so that when aunty and uncles come forcing me to play at dinner parties, I don’t freeze up.

–       Travel to France. And wear underpants.

–       Make 5 new, good friends. Solid ones, not hi-bye frou-frou ones.

–       Expand vocabulary by 20%.  e.g., not using things like frou-frou.

–       Increase savings by 20%

–       Read 30 great books.  Contrary to popular belief, I don’t read that much, or read as much as I should.

–       Wear contact lenses for lesser hours. The rate at which my eyesight is going scares me to no end.

–       Increase Malay, Mandarin and Cantonese language skills. And to a lesser degree French and Hokkien. The goal is recognizing atleast 80% of mandarin words in the newspaper, and not my current state of 50%. The goal for Melayu is to be able to cakap dengan lebih fasih, dan memperkenalkan (probably wrong usage, I don’t know) pasar, bukan baku. Ashraf, Imang, Ea, Carmen ah! Tolong ya?

–       Be a better friend. I can’t tell you the specifics for this one, secret a bit.

–       Start treating guys a bit more like how I treat my girls. Must give them more love and less distance. I don’t know, I’ve always treated guys with more distance for fears that unwanted feelings would develop, but hey, I’m not that alluring, neither are they, So I think its pretty safe now.

–       Having a solid, specific style. Like Mel (Lee), who with one look, you know what her style is all about. I want something like that. This year, I’m not allowing anymore sloppy days, cause you don’t know how many times I’ve taken a look in the mirror and went “meh…*shrugs”, then went out and met a hottie and went “oh fudge… I wish I put on my eyeliner today.” You never know when you’re going to meet a hottie, and cause we’re not getting any younger, I should wear all I can wear now before it becomes gaudy and crazy.

So, Happy New Year everyone! Raises glass*. May the coming year bring us great snogging, thrilling adventures, more goals achieved, more life lived, and may we find some great interesting people. Let’s also do some falling in love- either with people, or things to do, or new books or bands… May we find some great discoveries… and may we take honesty as our partner, love a little larger, and be better people.

So much to do, and we only have 365 days to do it.